Feel like you’re always over-giving, never making enough, or being enough in business? Learn how the mother wound affects entrepreneurship and how to heal it!
Two years ago, I was in a coaching relationship that wasn’t supporting me the way I had hoped. I was living with a roommate who wasn’t the fit I wanted.
I was so frustrated, overwhelmed, and DONE with “always giving and never receiving.” That was practically my catchphrase at the time.
When I was venting to my husband Jeramia, I let out an anguished sigh “they’re just like my mom.”
A sentence that would change my life forever.
For years, I had a strained relationship with my mom. Passive aggressive fights, never being on the same page, and taking every word as a personal attack.
Mother’s Day was uncomfortable. I could never find a card that could tell my mom what she wanted to hear but also honored my pain.
I kept having the same patterns play out in my relationships with women – coaches, peers, personal friends, and more.
(Never my clients though…I got lucky that way)
For the past few years, I poured all I could into understanding myself, my purpose, and my relationship with my mom. I threw myself full force into mother wound healing to free myself from years of pain.
Now, I’m delighted to start giving back to you.
We think that once we’re adults, we’re our own person. Which IS true…but there’s also a catch.
So many of us carry emotional baggage, co-dependencies, and unhealed wounds/trauma with us from our families.
And it’s affecting our businesses.
Shitty relationships with clients, money, our businesses, and ourselves. Believing we aren’t enough. Trying to prove ourselves to others through our success.
I’m determined to change that.
We have to start talking about how our family shit affects EVERYTHING ELSE in our lives – our businesses included.
I love my mom with all my heart. Thanks to this mother wound healing, our relationship is completely different. I’m so grateful to her and my birth mother for giving me life, teaching me so much about the world, and protecting me as best they could.
I’m ready to honor them by giving this and more to you.
Signs You Need Mother Wound Healing as an Entrepreneur
The Mother Wound is a wound to our divine feminine. Essentially, this wound says that we aren’t enough. The mother wound in entrepreneurship manifests in a variety of different ways.
Mother wound healing is what started my own healing journey. And this healing also transformed my money relationship. It’s led me to create my high multi-four figure months, booking five-figure clients, and feeling empowered as the creator of my wealth.
These are five signs that it’s time to do some mother wound healing as a business owner. I’m not sharing these to shame or attack you. Quite the opposite actually! If you see yourself in these signs, I invite you to be kind, loving, and accepting of yourself. The only way to heal a wound is with love – not force or shame. You deserve that kindness and grace.
You over give to exhaustion
Do you always feel like you’re the only giving and never receiving? Trust me, you’re not the only one. My first online venture was a lifestyle blog called Be Simply It. The mission of BSI was to support the “natural giver” in allowing herself to receive. The Divine Feminine receives. So when we feel like we can ONLY give, our receiving capacity is diminished. If you find yourself always being the giver in relationships, it’s often a sign that there’s some mother wound healing work to be done.
You measure your worthiness with money
This is the MOST COMMON struggle that my clients initially come to me with – believing that they need to make money in order to be good enough. This shows up in different ways for all of us.
- Frequently saying “it’s not enough (money)” = “I’m not enough
- Shaming yourself over debt and seeing those payments as punishment for your “bad behavior”
- Setting super lofty money goals then being REALLY damn hard on yourself when you don’t meet them
- Constantly feeling like you’re trying to prove something through making more money / meeting money goals
These are all common ways that we get into a tangled mess with our money relationship (and ways that mother wound manifests in business). If these are TOTALLY you, I definitely recommend taking my free money email course that you can sign up for below!
You reject femininity
Our relationship with our mothers modeled “how” relationships with women are “supposed” to work in the real world. We first learned how to receive love from women from our mothers.
The mother wound often affects our willingness to receive love and support from other women. For example, you might not trust other women, harshly judge women (their weak, entitled, etc), or reject femininity in your life. “Girly” things are less valued than masculine because your view of the feminine is wounded.
You avoid emotionally intimate relationships with women
Related to the above point on rejecting femininity, this often shows up in business as an avoidance of emotionally intimate relationships with women.
This can show up in a few different ways:
- Not trusting women coaches or jumping into coaching relationships with women who “burn” you – then using this as “proof” that you shouldn’t have done it in the first place
- Putting up barriers between you and women clients by making your prices too high to protect yourself or too low to “prove” to yourself that they don’t value you (“too high” and “too low” being determined by your energy and the underlying emotional why beneath the number)
- Positioning yourself as the coach or advice giver in relationships with your peers to avoid sharing how you need support or being vulnerable with your pain
General feelings of unworthiness
Ultimately, the mother wound comes down to not feeling worthy. Feeling like no matter how hard you try or what you do, you (or the business, money, success) won’t be enough. Or feeling like you aren’t worthy or deserving of receiving money, success, good clients, etc.
How to Heal the Mother Wound
Truthfully, healing the mother wound is a lifetime of commitment to yourself and your healing. But it all starts with self compassion, acceptance, forgiveness, and self love.
If you saw yourself when reading this post (and maybe even felt a bit called out), this isn’t to shame or attack you. Instead, to help you see yourself so can understand and accept yourself even more.
I’ll cover more on the “how to” in another post soon. But until then, you can check out a sneak peek on this Instagram post.