Feeling like your manifestations are stuck in the ethers? Here’s what to do when the law of attraction isn’t working!
Honestly, I have a love/hate relationship with manifestation and the law of attraction. Because when it works, it’s pretty magical.
Like the time that I told myself “I make money anytime that I step on a plane.” Then seconds later, I received an inquiry for a $6,000 copy project without lifting a finger.
The project got booked, I got paid, the client swooned. And it all started with me imagining my upcoming trip for my latest retreat, stepping on a plane, and getting a notification that payment was received.
Did I just hack the Matrix or something? Nah, girl. You manifested it!
However, when your manifesting skills aren’t producing results, it gets frustrating AF. Which kinda defeats the purpose of the whole manifesting thing because you’re supposed to feel amazing, act as if it’s already there, yada yada.
But when you REALLY want the thing, it can get disheartening at times to see that all your visualizing, acting as if, gratitude lists, and meditations aren’t creating that thing in your physical reality.
So today, I want to have an honest conversation with you about manifesting, what to do when it’s NOT working, and a perspective shift that has always worked for me to allow me to manifest what’s on my desire.
I’ll warn you, I have a different perspective on manifestation. It’s one of those that’ll have you going “yes, yes, yes, this so resonates with me” or “huh? *scratches head*”. If the first one is you, stick around with me and there’s more where this came from. If the second one is you, thanks for being here and being open to new ideas and perspectives!
Ok, without further ado. Let’s chat about what to do when the law of attraction isn’t working.
What’s the Deal with the Law of Attraction & Manifestation?
Before I dive in, I want to chat real quick on what manifestation and the Law of Attraction are all about. At least, for the purposes of this post because I’m all about us being on the same page. #ConsciousCommunicationRules
TheLawofAttraction.com defines the Law of Attraction (also known as the LOA) as “the Law of Attraction is the ability to attract into our lives whatever we are focusing on.” According to the website, the LOA is part of the physical laws of the Universe that dictate all of humanity. In simple terms, the LOA says that “thoughts turn into things.”
Now, as the spiritual gurus say, manifestation is the practice of matching the energetic frequency with what you desire so that it can appear (or manifest) in your physical reality. Using the Law of Attraction, you can (theoretically) manifest anything that you want by focusing on it, acting as if it’s already here, and matching your frequency to the frequency of the thing that you want.
If you want money, think about that $5,000. Visualize it, imagine it in your bank account, then show up as if it’s already happened and *poof* the money will show up for you because you’re on the same energetic plane.
Now, this practice has worked for MANY people. It’s even worked for me as you’ve seen above.
But, I’ve found for myself (and many of my friends/clients) that the process doesn’t always work. So what gives? Why is it that sometimes you can think about the thing that you want and it shows up….and other times, it doesn’t?
Let’s chat more on what to do if the the law of attraction isn’t working for you.
You’re Overly Attached
Sometimes, when we want something SO BADLY, we get overly attached to making sure that it happens. Basically, we want it so much, we try to control the outcome.
When we’re trying to control the outcome and how things happen, we’re (a) often embodying desperate energy and (b) aren’t open to other possibilities. As I’m sure you’ve experience with bad dates, clingy friends, or your cat, desperate energy is repellent. When we’re desperate, we push away everything that could come towards us like a drop of oil in water.
Also, if you’re clinging so tightly to a perceived way of how things “have to be”, you’re hands aren’t open to receive all that could be. Thankfully, we aren’t omnipotent beings. Therefore, we don’t actually KNOW all the ways that things could happen nor do we have to the power to create them.
That’s up to the Universe to create for you. The “how” isn’t your business. Which is an incredible gift. Because it takes that pressure off of you and gives it to who can truly take the reigns (i.e. the Big U). This is one way that you show that you are able to receive and can allow yourself to be supported. It’s part of becoming an energetic match for receiving what you desire.
Recommended Exercise: On the top of a piece of paper, write the thing that you are manifesting. Draw a line down the middle of the paper. On the left side, write your name at the top. On the right side, write the name of the Divine – God, The Universe, Spirit, Source, etc.
Then, in the column with your name, write everything that you are committed to doing to create what you desire. For example, connecting with certain people, creating the offer, meditating daily, etc. In the column for the Divine, write everything that you ask the Universe to do for you. For example, show me X as a sign that I’m on the right path, connect me with the people I’m meant to, etc.
This exercise is powerful because it clearly distinguishes what is and isn’t your responsibility. Own up to where you can take action. Hand over what’s outside of your control and allow yourself to be supported.
Explore Your Resistance
Yes, it’s scary to think that the thing you want to manifest won’t show up for you. But what’s often even SCARIER is what happens if it DOES?
Fear of failure is common and often present in the conscious mind. We’re afraid of what people will think or that we’ll have to continue feeling discomfort.
But the fear that often keeps us from moving forward is our fear of SUCCESS. Usually, this is lodged in the subconscious mind. The subconscious fears what will happen is we DO get everything that we want. Because if that were to happen, everything would change.
Whereas, if we “fail”, we know that things will stay the same or at least be in familiar territory. We can continue to be stressed about being broke or complaining about single or saying that we don’t know what the next step is. This is comfortable territory for our egos because it’s known. So they’ll do everything they can to keep us from expanding into the unknown – success.
Recommended Exercise: For 15-minutes, write and answer the question “what am I afraid would happen if I received [the thing you most want]?” Write non-stop for that entire time without lifting pen from paper. This will help you access your subconscious fears that are tucked away deeper in your mind.
Common things that come up are I can’t continue saying that I’m broke/single/tired as an excuse and I’ll have to show up, I don’t trust myself to receive that much money/love, people will see me differently and then reject me, I have to let go of my struggle which is a part of my identity, etc.
When you see those fears on paper, it helps to “see” why you won’t let yourself get what you really want. The brain is all about survival; it’s here to keep us safe. It does a VERY good job of it. So if receiving what you want is perceived as a threat, then it will keep it from you.
See these fears, thank them for protecting you, and release them. I also do a meditation with my clients specifically around witnessing their fear with love and tenderness. If you need some private support around this, I highly recommend booking a Magic Hour session!
Ok, this is where I’m shaking things up a bit. Manifesting is great in all that it shows people the power of their minds and focus. It gets them out of the normal patterns of thinking and expanding their vision of possibility.
Yet, I don’t believe that manifesting is really about just changing your thoughts so you can get what you want. For me, manifesting is about POWER RECLAMATION. It’s about calling in your power so that can do, create, and be all that you were meant to be on this Earth. A vital part of that is receiving what you need to be supported like money, support systems, clients you enjoy working with, etc.
This is the most common “block” that I’ve found to manifesting. When the thoughts aren’t doing it for you and you’re wondering wtf do I need to do because the law of attraction isn’t working for me, it’s often because there are deeper wounds to heal. In my experience, the more that I heal, move, and release my emotional baggage and pain, the more that I receive. Because as I release these wounds from my energy field, I create space to receive more.
Truthfully, allowing myself to feel full-frontal heartbreak, cry, and let it all go has done MORE for me, my growth journey, and even my business than slapping on a smile in the name of good vibes ever has. I bring the same to my clients. Witnessing, holding, and supporting you in your full range of emotionality is part of my specialty as a coach.
It’s an incredibly healing experience to be held, accepted, and seen in your emotionality. Rather than saying “are you done yet?” the essence of this work asks “is there more?” If you feel like you need this support right now, book a Magic Hour and I’d love to support you in your healing and witness you in your rising!